Plan Actions Not Results...

Wait, what? Aren't outcomes most important?

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Dear Friend,

Happy March!

We made it into the 3rd month of the year in one peice (hopefully). Go ahead and join me in giving yourself a pat on your back for whatever things (whether tiny or massive) you accomplished last month. Remember, life is often very haaaaaard! So, sometimes the most insignificant wins are what we need to celebrate to keep ourselves going.

One of my wins is continuing to say YES! to things that I truely value - my business, my kids, nature, creative expression, wonderment, whole heartedness, and serving others (to name a few).

In January, I said 'yes' to my creative expression by applying for a parent's artist residency being hosted by Performance Works NW (PWNW). I haven't been performing in years and even less so, doing creative movement-based works! But, because I love and miss making performance art - I went for it.

I threw together some video of very, very rough sketches for a performance idea I had in only 30 minutes (the time available to use my friend's yoga studio for filming). To be honest, it wasn't great... a bit embarrasing even! However, because I simply didn't have time to submit anything better, I submitted what I had. It was done; not perfect.

Unsurprisingly, I was told that I was not chosen for the residency. While there was a moment of disappointment, I was kind of relieved. PWNW would have posed some logistical challenges to get to and to be honest, there were likely far more deserving applicants than myself.

Though I was not chosen for this residency, I count the fact that I submitted the application as a huge success! It was one tiny (and very brave) step towards taking my artistic passions seriously.

In the past, I would have avoided applying all together, allowing perfectionism and the fear of failure stop me in my tracks. In fact, last year when my friend told me about the parent residency, I DIDN'T apply because I had nothing "ready".

So, what changed between now and last year?

The big change was my having the realization that my success had nothing to do with winning the residency and everything to do with completing the application no matter what.

Applying was an actionable and a reletively low-risk way to affirm how much I want creative expression in my life! The whole thing was an exercise in humility, letting go, accepting where I am in the present, and opening to opportunities even if I'm not "ready" for them, yet. It was a powerful way to align myself with many of my deeply held values.

How I showed up for the application process was completely within my locus of control. However, the determination of who was chosen was outside of my control. Because of this, I didn't set my hopes and expectations on being chosen. Instead, I placed my marker of success in what I did have control over - taking values-based action towards prioritizing my creative work. Therefore, my goal was centered on finishing the application, not on winning the residency.

Each step in the process was a success...

The badly done video submissions - success! Writing the application - success! Facing my inner critics and fears about being rejected - success! Application submitted - success!

Not chosen for the residency - eh... whatever, that's fine.

I already had so many successes racked up by the time I heard the result that it didn't matter that much. Sure, there was still that twinge of disappointment (one does hope afterall), but since I knew that I had taken aligned action towards my values, I was fine.

Before I realized the importance of action over results, I had a very different take on success and failure.

I only felt successful when I met my exact expectations and achieved my goals in the exact way that I had envisioned (pretty much never). If the results were even slightly outside of what I had hoped for (always a specific outcome), there was no success to be had.

When I didn't achieve what I wanted, I took it personally. I'd beat myself up and dub myself a "failure" instead of recognizing that the outcome revealed nothing about my internal worth. I was stuck in a pattern that made me feel terrible about myself because I didn't appreciate what I could gain from taking action, doing my best, and letting go of the results.

Now I understand why planning actions instead of results is so awesome!

Unlike in my past, by focusing on my actions now, I am more protected from the pain of potential disappointment. Rather than putting all my eggs in one basket for an outcome that I have little control over, I choose small wins that I can control and I focus on doing those things. That way, I'm almost guaranteed success!

Even if I don't reach a goal - I still tried. I planed to take action and then I took it! Taking action is always a win (especially if I can learn something from both the process and its results)!

What about you? Do you feel stuck in a pattern that prevents you from feeling successful?

Look below! I have a VERY special offer for you...

Starting in just a few weeks, I will be leading a small group of self-proclaimed "failures", perfectionists, and late bloomers through a mind-body based group process. This process will help you to find new ways to experience success in your life - success that is rooted in your own personal values and attained through a series of small, aligned actions.

Want in? Respond to this email and I'll send you the details!

Join the Journey! Calling all late-bloomers, perfectionists, and self-professed failures! On Tuesday, March 21 we will begin an embodied journey into the golden heart of failure where surprising gifts reside! Join us to learn how to release past disappointments, embrace mistakes, have more fun, and redefine success for YOU! Respond to this email to let me know you are interested!

113 Cherry St #92768, Seattle, Washington 98104-2205
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